2.“The new trend where the wedding party leaves after the ceremony on a party bus and show up one to two hours later, totally wasted, while the guests have been left at the reception, bored as hell. So disrespectful to ditch the guests you invited.”
3.“I’m going with the bouquet toss. I think some people find it funny, but for weddings where the brides aren’t 22, I think it’s just cringey and putting the same emphasis and expectation of marriage on every single woman at the wedding. It just seems outdated, and it makes a lot of women feel awkward.”
4.“I’ve seen an alarming number of people on the internet who think it’s OK not to feed wedding guests because ‘they don’t have the money.’ Like OK, that’s fine — then don’t have a party? You’re asking people to take their time and resources for you, and you won’t even give them a sandwich and some Hawaiian Punch? Fuck off.”
5.“Guests should try to avoid inviting strangers to intimate weddings as their plus-one. They make it awkward, and they’re also in all photos of the event — despite the fact that the ‘relationships’ are short-term.”
6.“The wedding font…you know the font. It’s used on invitations to bridal showers, bach parties, weddings, and more. Let it rest. It’s time to move on.”
7.“Learn the difference between a toast and a speech! A toast is not a speech, and a speech is not a toast! A toast is a congrats to the couple and should be brief: ‘To Mike and Joan! May their lives be happy!’ Speeches are pointless and boring. NEITHER TOASTS NOR SPEECHES ARE REQUIRED! Just tell your DJ not to give the mic to anybody you didn’t approve beforehand and start the party.”
14.“Our DJ was just awful. He was late showing up, so he was still setting up his equipment when we got there (which was five minutes before the reception was supposed to start). He was also not dressed yet, so once he got set up he was gone for the next 30 minutes changing. We ended up not getting introduced and just walked in. So DJs — be ready and be on time!”
15.“We used a decorative blanket as our ‘sign in’ thing. Sometime during the reception these little fucking kids who weren’t family wrote on almost every square using the three or four curse words they knew over and over. Had to keep my anger at bay until after our honeymoon. Didn’t want to tell my wife what had happened. So, control your kids — if they’re invited.”
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